The climate!!!

I am happy today. The weather here in Ghaziabad has become bearable. I know that, this is no reason to be overly ecstatic. But what has created this sense of jubilation in me, is the fact that the overcast skies and the slight drizzle took me on a trip down the memory lane.
I come from a place, named Kerala. It is a small (one of the smallest) state in India, but blessed with so much geographical diversity that one can find a beach resort in Cochin and travel for 2 hours and find a hill resort in Munnar. Mountains, valleys, lakes and beaches are all thrown in haphazardly into the melee` that is Kerala. It looks as though God was playing a jigsaw puzzle and did not bother to finish it.
Today, the cloudy, overcast weather and the intermittant rain here, reminded me of my school days. I used to cycle to school in the mornings and during the monsoon season used to brave similar kind of weather. The rain gods have their share of merriment in Kerala during monsoon. The sun might be shining early in the morning and the soothing rays of sun might alleviate a certain amount of fear gnawing your heart, but the rain gods have their own definition of fun. One might decide to cycle out without a rain-coat, since the skies are sunny and the birds are chirping and voila, there comes rain puring down and drenching you to your very skin. It is fun for the sole one week after the summer and then one might start cursing the unpredictable rain; I know I did.
Eventhough it has its faults, monsoon has its sunny side too. I remember dancing in the rain without a care in the world while my mother shook her fist at me and warned me to come into the house. "Dont make me come out there Sathyanarayanan", she used to say. She had the habit of using my full name whenever she wanted to make an angry point with me. She felt that she came across as a very ominous person, that way. Little did she know that, it invogorated me to put great efforts into whatever I was doing.
I remember running in the rain to the mango tree, which used to shed its juicy, ripe mangoes when the rain and wind hit it. It was always a race (Yes, at this point you should know that I have two elder sisters, who still takes the concept of sibling rivalry to a whole new level when it comes to the matter of mangoes). The first pick of the mangoes went to the person who reached the tree first. My first initiation to the FCFS algorithm came in this manner.

The rain drops dripping from the leaves, the small puddles of water, the small grass blades sprouting from the earth grateful for the water, the cold yet calming zephyr bearing with it the scent of soil mixed with first rain, all makes me nostalgic. I want to go home where I belong and where I am loved and dance in the rain once again...

Love

I dont know much about love. I have fallen in love. But I cannot explain the intricacies of it. If I had been a scientist, I would have attempted to explain it as the hormones trying to play havoc with lives. If I had been a self-torturing, moody, mysterious painter with artistic chagrin, I would have painted numerous paintings on the subject. Since I am neither, I attempt to give meaning to a sensation that many worthier souls than me have tried to capture, in words.

My tryst with love began when I was eight. I felt unusually attracted to a girl in my class who sat next to me in my class. She was very nice to me and she had a beautiful pink bow on her hair which made her look all the more pretty. Now I dont remember her face exactly, but I remember the happiness that I felt whenever I was with her. I can look back and say that I have had several encounters with this self same form of happiness in varying degrees of intensity, over the 17 years I have hence spent.

I have not yet attempted to define love and for good reason. It is undefinable. Whenever my math teacher explained the concept of infinity, I had my own equation to fit it. Infinity = Love. So, at a very young age itself I had realised that love can define other things but nothing can define love.

People say that it is better to have loved and lost than never loved at all. I believe that it is better to have loved and lost than to have loved and won. All the love stories that we see in movies, read about in books, depict the hero and heroine fulfilling their love and living happily ever after. Is there 'happily ever after'? This brings me to my basic premise. Love is most beautiful when it is lost. We miss things the most when we can never have them. So I believe that unrequitted, unfulfilled love is the most potent form of love. Afterall, what is love, without heart-wrenching, emotional trauma?

Education is an impediment to learning!!!

I am pursuing MBA education at a premier institute in India. What life here has taught me is that, grades matter much more than humanity, friendship and affection. Needless to say, I have a bunch of insolent, self-indulgent, know-it-alls around me and they share my classes, space and time.
We had a quiz in 'Strategic Management', yesterday and questions were asked not from our textbooks, but from different sources. Many people, including me, fared badly in the quiz. I let it go by, but majority of the students wanted a re-quiz, with questions asked from the portions that they had studied.
I agree that there is a certain amount of merit in their argument, but questioning the qualifications and methods of the professor and arguing and haggling for every single mark is what perturbs me.
There was another interesting sight visible until last year, when the answer sheets used to be distributed in the class-rooms. Students would swoop down on the teachers like vultures on a dead carcass, demanding to know why they have gotten the marks they received.
It is a sad plight. On one hand, it amuses me to find 25 to 30 year old young men and women acting like they are back in primary school, but on the other, it saddens me that the education that we receive fails to inculcate a sense of responsibility in us. It brings us to the crux of the problem. The students are worried about securing a placement in a reputed company than gaining knowledge. Everything that we do out here is a means to secure the end result, i.e., a good placement. I do not isolate myself from the rest. But once in a while, I stand and stare at what I am and what I am becoming.
Let me list the learnings gained, so far:
-I have learned not to trust anyone, not even my shadow.
-If anyone offers unsolicited help, it has an ulterior motive attached to it.
-It is a competitive world out there, so relish the failure of others and rub their noses in it, if that is possible.
-All kinds of relationships, be it friendship, friendship with hope for romance or pure romance, are for convenience. Indulge in these, if it serves your purpose.
-Most importantly, love yourself and only yourself.
I am disturbed by these take-aways from this place, but I guess this is what, being ready for the world means. Real world, here I come, a cold-blooded animal hell bent upon achieving my goals at any cost...

First Post

I am Sathya. I am trying out blogging for the very first time. Let me see how long the honeymoon lasts...